Second Thoughts, Chapter Twelve by: Ashley

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Dawson was searching his mind for a response to her statement. His best friend; soul mate had just told him that she was pregnant. He stood there in front of her shocked as his mind tried to compute her news.

“I…..I had no-” Dawson began, trying to reply.

“It’s yours,” she told him. “Before you go off thinking that it’s Pacey’s,” she told him. Dawson looked at her and smiled.

“Mine?” he asked in disbelief.

Joey nodded. “I just found out a week or so; I’m um… about ten weeks,“ she added looking at the floor, the walls, anywhere then directly at his face; into his deep blue eyes. “Do the math if you don’t believe me.”

“No, I believe you, it’s just…” Dawson trailed off. “Jo, we were careful that night. We-” Joey looked up at him in disbelief.

“Yeah well, I guess we weren’t careful enough, now were we Dawson?” she said in a hostile tone.

“Joey, what’s wrong? Why are you getting angry with me?” he asked instantly picking up on her anger and hostility.

“Do you know how hard it was to come here Dawson?” she asked. “To-to see Pacey’s face when he found you and I slept together, or when he realized the baby was yours?!” she yelled.

“Joey, you walked out on me the next morning! We never got a chance to talk about anything!” Dawson said, both of their voices raised.

“Oh, I see how it is; this is all m fault, huh?” she asked sarcastically.

“No! Joey-” Dawson said quickly.

“All my fault because I was scared about the feelings I had for you that night when I was supposed to be with Pacey!” Joey continued.

“No! Joey would you just stop for a second?” he pleaded as he walked closer to her and gripped her shoulders.

“Why should I Dawson, you’re the one that doesn’t want our child, and I for one-”

“Wait a second Jo; who said anything about me not wanting to keep this baby?” he asked confused. Joey looked at him who was also confused.

“You’re not mad? You…wanna keep the baby?” Joey asked, unsure of what was going through Dawson’s mind. He reached for her hands and took them in his he thought in awe at being a father. Having a child with Joey. It was perfect.

“Joey, I couldn‘t think of anything else more perfect….then for us to have a baby together.” Joey felt relieved after hearing those words. Like a huge boulder had just been lifted from her shoulders. Dawson smiled and pulled her into a long hug.

After a few minutes of hugging, they slowly pulled apart. Joey smiling and Dawson grinning at the thought of the baby; their foreheads touching.

“Jo?” Dawson asked in a whispered tone. Joey looked up at him.

“Yeah?” she whispered back. Dawson grinned.

“You know what this means? Were going to be parents,” he said in both aw and happiness. Joey smiled too.

“I know,” she said simply, not being able to hide the happiness in her voice. “Now all we gotta figure out is the basics, and were all set, huh?” Joey asked. Dawson smiled and she laughed lightly.

“We’ll make this work, I promise,” he said. Joey nodded as she looked up at him. He looked at her and continued to smile down at her, unable to stop grinning.

“You know, this is going to change a lot of things with us Dawson, both our lifestyles are going to have to change, and-” Dawson, still grinning, stopped Joey with a tender kiss.

“We can talk about all of this later Jo,” he said. “But right now let’s get out of here. What do you say?” Joey smiled.

“Yeah. That sounds like a good idea,” she said smiling as the tow of them walked out of his office smiling like fools in love. Dawson ran over to his secretary as they walked out of his office.

“I’m gonna be a father, Debbie! Can you believe it?” he asked happily. The poor woman just looked at him shocked, and unable to answer.

“I-I…” she stammered, not sure how to respond. But she didn’t have to worry, Dawson was already dragging Joey away by the hand. “Oh boy…” she sighed.

“So…” Dawson began. “Are you sure I can’t get you anything?” he asked as he moved to get up from beside her on the couch. Joey quickly put her hand on his leg.

“Dawson, I’m ok,” she assured him for the third time since they had arrived at his apartment.

He smiled quickly. “Alright.”

“I’m sure there are a lot of questions running through your mind right about now,” Joey said. Dawson laughed.

“Yeah I can think of a few.” He paused. “Jo, why’d you wait so long before telling me about all this?” he asked.

Joey sighed. “Dawson, I was already about six weeks along when I found out-”

“Joey, your now what, two months?” he interjected.

“I was afraid ok?” she finished.

Dawson looked at her for a second. “Afraid of what?” Joey looked down at her lap. Dawson softly tilted her chin up so that he could see her face. “Joey?”

“I was afraid that you would think that this was all just a big mistake, and that… maybe the baby was one too.” She paused, tears forming in her eyes. “Dawson, I was so afraid…” Dawson cupped her face and brushed a tear away from her face with his thumb softly.

“I would never think that Joey. You could never be thought of as a mistake in my life. “ he assured her. He paused.

“I just wish you were as sure.” Joey looked up at him, her expression hurt and confused.

“What does that mean?” she asked as she moved her face away from his touch. Dawson looked at her straight in the face. “Jo, I wanna know if this time your serious about being with me,” he said honestly. “I mean dead serious because I just can’t go through this again. Ten months ago you were absolute certain that Pacey was the love of you life, I just…” he paused. “I just want you to be sure this time; and not just because of this baby, but sure you want to be with me because you love me.” Joey reached for his hand.

“Dawson, you’ve always been the one. And that scares me because deep down I’ve always known that; you and me.” Joey shrugged before standing up and walking over to a window in the living room. “I love Pacey, but our time together is over; it’s been over with for a long time I just didn‘t realize it ‘till now.” she explained.

Dawson looked at her, still a little unsure. “So what does that means for us?”

“What do you want it to mean?” she answered.

“Honestly, I want this to be it; our shot to finally be together.”

Joey smiled at the idea. “Alright. We’ll start there.” Dawson smiled as he leaned over and kissed her.

“I wanna take you out for dinner tonight. What do you say?” Dawson asked.

Joey smiled. “Dawson Leery, are you asking me out on a date?” she asked.

“Something like that.” He grinned.

“I’d love to,” she said honestly.

“Wow,” Joey said as she and Dawson walked towards his car; the two of them holding hands.

“What?” he asked curiously.

“I can officially say that I am stuffed.” Both of them laughed.

“Yeah, you did eat kind of a lot, huh?” he joked as he unlocked the car doors.

“Yeah sure, make fun of the mother of your unborn child,” Joey said as the two of them got into the car. “I am eating for two remember,” she reminded him. Dawson leaned over and kissed her.

“And I think it makes you all the more sexy,” he told her. Joey smiled.

“Yeah, you won’t be thinking that in another three months,” she assured him. Dawson backed the car out of the parking spot and drove out of the parking lot.

“I’ll be saying it even more,” he promised. The two held hands as Dawson drove. Joey couldn’t believe how incredibly well it was all turning out, although she decided not to vocalize that. Every time something good happens in my life I always end up jinxing it by saying something, Joey said to herself. And I’m not going to let that happen this time.

Dawson looked over at Joey. “You’re awfully quiet,” he observed.

“Just thinking’” she explained.

“Jo? Would it be safe to assume that Bessie knows about the baby?” he asked. Joey looked over at him.

“Yes.” Dawson sighed.

“Then I’m sure my mother already knows,” he said. Joey looked at him feeling a little confused.

“Would that be a bad thing?” she asked. Dawson looked over at her.

“No. No of coarse not; that’s not what I meant,” he said quickly. “I just… I dunno. I guess I kinda wanted us to go back to Capeside together and tell her. She’ll be ecstatic when she finds out there’s a baby on the way for her to spoil.” Both of them laughed picturing Gale spoiling their baby.

“When do you have to go back; to New York I mean,” he asked.

“The day after tomorrow,” she said unable to keep the sadness out of her voice.

“So what then?” Dawson asked.

Joey sighed. “I don’t know,” she paused. “Dawson, you think maybe we could talk about this tomorrow?” she asked.

“Of coarse,” he said as he reached for her hand and gave it a loving squeeze. They drove in silence for a little while longer.

“I can’t believe I didn’t ask you this earlier, but….where are you staying anyways?” he asked.

“Oh, I’m staying with Audrey actually.” Dawson smiled knowing the two were probably taking every opportunity to catch up. He was glad Joey was staying with such a close friend and not in a motel or something like that.

“How is Audrey?” he asked.

“You don’t talk to her?” she asked, a little surprised.

“I know, it’s crazy how close we live near one another and yet we don’t talk a whole lot.”

“Why is that?” she asked curiously.

“The simple answer would be that I’ve been really busy with work.” Joey’s heart ached when he said that. Even though Gale had said the same thing a few weeks ago in Capeside, hearing them come out of his mouth hurt even more.

“Jo, you ok?” he asked. Joey snapped out of her thoughts.

“Huh?”

“Where do you go when you do that?” he asked.

“Trust me Dawson, it’s no place pretty,” she assured him. Her comment caused him to frown slightly as he concentrated on the road. Instead of commenting on her comment, Dawson decided to change the subject.

“What are you doing tomorrow?” he asked.

“Um… As far as I know, I’m not doing anything,” she said.

“Good.”

“Why?” Joey asked.

“You’ll just have to wait until tomorrow,” he told her cryptically, with a smile on his face. Joey’s smile matched his.

“What about your work? Don’t they need you?” she asked.

“I guess they’ll just have to do without me for a day, now won’t they?” Joey laughed.

“Alright, fine,” she sighed in defeat, knowing he wouldn’t tell her.

“Here we are,” Dawson said a few minutes later as he pulled up to Audrey’s apartment.

“Here we are,” she repeated. Dawson looked over at her and smiled before getting out of the car and walking towards her side.

“Thanks” Joey said as Dawson opened her door and extended his hand. The two walked up to Audrey’s front door in silence.

“Well… I guess I’ll see you tomorrow,” Joey said as they reached the door. Dawson smiled.

“Goodnight Dawson.”

“’Night Joey.” It took all the will power Dawson could muster to turn around and walk back to his car. Joey’s smile faded as she waved goodbye to him and watched him drive off. She sighed before opening the door and walking in.

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