Rating: Um..Yeah, I think an R.
Classification: I guess Dawson/Joey romance. But this has Andie and Pacey too.
Author's Note: Hello all you wonderful people in fanfiction land. Well, this is my first fanfiction seperate from Jenny (not to worry, we will be continuing with our other series!) But seeing as how busy Miss Jenny is since she got into pit orchestra.. J/K Jen--I am soo proud of you! Anyway, this story deals with mature themes so I'm sure that all of you won't let any small children read this. Please make sure they don't. I don't want to be arrested for like corruption of a minor. Hope you enjoy my first part of the story! Feedback would be wonderful!!!!
Dedication: To Beth, my very good friend who I am going to miss sooo much next year and is at this very moment is sitting there smacking her head moaning "I've failed!" :)
This Woman's Work
"Pray God you can cope,
I stand outside this woman's work,
This woman's world.."
"Dawson..Have you seen my briefcase?" Gail Leery looked around frantically. "I can't find it anywhere and I'm going to be so late.." Unusually disorganized this morning, Gail was flipping out in major porportions.
"Um..mom?" Dawson grinned as he held up his Mom's brown leather briefcase. Gail rolled her eyes.
"Oh, thanks Honey. I don't know what I'd do without you! What are your plans for the day? And tell me quickly, because I HAVE to go!"
"Joey and I are just going to hang out here and watch movies, I think." Gail smiled at this. She was so happy her favorite surrogate daughter and biological son had finally gotten back together. She had seen the anguish Dawson had gone through when they had broken up, and she worried that she hadn't been much of a help, being at the time her own marriage was dissolving.
"Well, have fun." She started toward the door, without taking the briefcase from Dawson's hand. She turned around and grabbed it. Kissing her boy on the cheek, Gail had a thought and frowned. "Not too much fun." Dawson gave out a small laugh and watched his mother run out the front door. What the woman didn't know couldn't hurt her.
* * * * *
Joey Potter groaned. She felt retched. She felt miserable. Moreover, she felt scared. What am I going to do? she thought to herself. She had had her head stuck in a toilet a good part of the morning, regurgitating what felt like everything she had eaten in the past sixteen years of her life. This was the third time this had happened in the past week. Joey took this as a sign she wasn't dealing with the simple stomach flu she had assumed she'd had. More importantly her period was a week late.
She flushed the toilet for the third time that morning and went to try and pull herself together. She was supposed to go over to Dawson's today. It's not possible that this is happening to me. Even my life cannot be this screwy. Not when things are finally beginning to work out. Sighing, Joey picked up the phone. After dialing a number, she spoke into the reciever.
"Andie? I need a favor..."
* * * * *
Dawson was beginning to wonder where Joey was. She'd said she'd be over by noon. Even allowing her a usual "Sorry I'm late, Alex was crying," grace period, she was abnormally late. Suddenly he heard the familiar clanging of her footsteps on the ladder outside.
"Hey," said Joey, swinging a leg over the windowsill.
"Hey, you. You're late." Dawson grinned and got up from the bed to kiss her. As he leaned in, she pulled back. Finishing the climb into the room, she shoved her hands into her jeans pockets and looked at the floor.
"Um. Dawson. I kind of need to talk to you." For the first time Dawson noticed that she looked kind of a sickly pale and that there were dark circles under her eyes, which were puffy, as though she'd been crying.
"Uh oh.," he said with a worried Dawson look in his eyes. "Something tells me this isn't good." Trying to lighten the mood he commented "Who are you dumping me for now?" Suddenly Joey burst into tears, almost out of nowhere. "Joey, Jo! What's going on?" Dawson was freaked out by this sudden turn of events. His best friend hardly ever cried. (Authors Note: Okay, so I'm really pathetic, but I've counted. Did you know that Joey has cried in ten out of the twenty eight episodes?) Dawson wrapped his arms around her. "Jo. Whatever it is. It just cannot be that bad."
Joey sobbed into his blue pullover sweater. It smelled of him. It smelled like home. She knew that the next five words out of her mouth were going to take away the feeling of control he had right now. The feeling of control over his life. The feeling of knowing where he stood in the big scheme of things. The feeling of love and contentment. The feeling of anything but fear. She removed herself a bit from his embrace. She said in a forced whisper of some emotion resembling regret, "Dawson, I think I'm pregnant."
"Ooh, it's hard on the man,
Now his part is over,
Now starts the craft of the father.."
* * * * *
Shock. Pure shock. For two minutes that was the only feeling Dawson Leery felt. Then the confusion and fear set in. "Wha-- Are you, are you sure?" He was sitting now on the bed, holding Joey's hand, but not really feeling her hand in his. She shook her head.
"No. I'm not. I--I brought over a test." She reached into her coat pocket and pulled out a pink box. She sniffed a bit and cleared her throat as Dawson looked somewhere over her head, maybe at his ET poster, she wasn't sure. "I, uh, I called Andie this morning and I asked her to buy one for me."
Dawson finally snapped back to reality. "ANDIE! You told ANDIE before you told me!!? Don't you think I should have been the first to know, huh!?" Joey looked at him. She could tell he was terrified. Well, you know what? She was terrified too. It was HER body they were discussing here.
"Don't yell at me! I didn't want to buy it myself!"
"Did it ever occur to you that maybe I could have bought it?" In his confusion and fear at how everything had changed, Dawson was taking all this out on the one person he should have been comforting here.
"You wouldn't have wanted too!" Joey yelled back. She then lowered her voice considerably. "Besides, did it ever occur to YOU that maybe I had a reason? That maybe I didn't want the fact I was buying a pregnancy test to get back to Bessie and Gail or Mitch? That maybe I thought of Andie because she is still relatively new in town and her mother practically never leaves the house, so who would report Andie bought a test to her? Or were you too busy screaming at me?" Joey began to cry again. Dawson took one look at her tearstained face, and broke.
"Oh, god, Jo." He stood up and went over to her, once again putting his arms around her. "It'll be okay. I promise, it'll be okay." He didn't know how it would be okay, but he knew he'd give his life to keep her from hurting. He loved her that much. "Shh, it's alright. I'm sorry for yelling. Shh.."
"Dawson..what are we going to do..?"
"I know you have a little life in you yet,
I know you have a lot of strength left,
I know you have a little life in you yet,
I know you have a lot of strength left.
I should be crying, but I just can't let it show
I should be hoping but I can't stop thinking.."
* * * * *
"Well, I'll tell you what were going to do," said Dawson. "We're going to take that test and see what it says. And if that test actually says that you are truely pregnant, then..we'll deal with it. We'll deal with it. Let's just..let's just make sure you're really pregnant first."
"Okay," Joey sniffed. His arm still around her shoulder he lead her to the bathroom door. Before she went in, he grabbed her hand tightly.
"Don't worry," he said. "I'm right here. No matter what I'm not going anywhere. You're not alone." She smiled a little at his blatant cheesiness, which she had never truely appreciated before. As she closed the door, he leaned back against it. Dawson thought about everything they had planned on doing. College, marriage, and eventually kids. He thought about the trip to Europe they were saving to go on after college, about high school graduation, about Friday night dates, and being free to be somewhat carefree. A baby would screw that all up in ways he couldn't even begin to comprehend right now.
"Of all the things I should have said
That I never said
All the things we should have done
That we never did
All the things I should have given
But I didn't..."
* * * * *
Inside the bathroom, Joey was reading the directions on the back of the box and thinking similar thoughts. She remembered the day she and Dawson had decided to go to Providence, spur of the moment. She thought back to the night they had danced, close together in the ruins until two am. She thought of them, so in love, thinking they were finally going to have some real happiness.
"Oh, darling, make it go
Make it go away
Give me these memories back
Give them back to me
Give me that little kiss
Give me your hand.."
* * * * *
"You ready?" Dawson took Joey's hand a nerve wracking five minutes later.
"Too bad." They walked into the bathroom.
"Wait!" said Joey, before they got past the threshold. "Just so there's no shock here, Dawson, I'm almost sure that..that, well, I am." He nodded his head.
"I know. You don't even really need to look at the test, do you?" She shook her head.
"No." Joey looked down.
"It's okay," he said. He went over and picked up the plastic stick sitting on the sink. She finally looked up.
"Yep," he said, forlornly. "We are proud parents to be." He paused. "DAMN!" He picked up a drinking glass and threw it across the bathroom. Joey jumped in surprise and then looked back down at the bathroom tile.
"All the things that you needed from me
All the things that you wanted for me
All the things I should have given
But I didn't
Oh, darling, make it go away
Just make it go away now."
Okay, how was that peoples? Too slow? I know, they thought a lot. Normally not my writing technique, so let me know if you despise it. Please, please, pretty please send me feedback because I need to know how you all felt about it, so I am formally admitting to making a desperate pathetic plea for emails here! Email me and add the title of the story, would ya? THANK YOU!
BTW- This wonderful song is by Kate Bush, a very cool singer, I think from the 80's. It was on Party of 5 and Felicity, if any of you are trying to place it. And speaking of songs, if anyone knows what the song is that they've been playing on trailers lately for DC would you pleeeasse email me, because it's really been bugging me! You know, the song "I don't belong here, you're so different from me..." ? Thanks! :)
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