You by: Holly

Previous | Next

Author's Note: Hey, ya'll. Thanks for the great feedback I've been getting! Keep it coming! Some of you have been asking me whether the baby will be a boy or girl. Well I've decided it will be a....oops. The phone just rang. Now what was I going to tell you? Oh, well, couldn't have been too important. :) (Yeah, right, did ya'll really think I was going to tell you? Now, would Kevin Williamson himself do that? I think not! :P )

Rating: Do any of you actually care? I mean if your 13 and I said no one under 14 should read this would you really just push the back button on your browser? I'll give you some time to think about this....okay? No, I didn't think so. Oh, by the way! I found out what the song is thanks to Dawson's Creek Headlines and bought the cd! Thank you sooo much Aaron and Mandy!

Joey shoved her Physcology book into her locker, frusteratedly. She was upset because she could hear the two girls whispering behind her, blatantly talking about that pregnant girl, who refused to safe herself shame by leaving school. She glanced at herself in the mirror that hung in her locker. She sighed at the black circles under her eyes. She was always tired lately, and had still been getting sick some morinings. It was completely exasperating to not be normal and have to only worry about the next Chem test or whether or not she was going to get a scholar ship or not. Joey guessed she didn't have to worry about that anymore. Who would give a mom a scholarship?

Dawson looked down the hall at Joey. Even though she looked exhausted, she was still beautiful. He knew she felt like she was in a precarious postion at school, known only as the pregnant girl. But she was so much more than that. If only he could make her realize that.

To top it all off, Dawson felt guilty that indirectly he was the cause of her pain. He remembered promising her that he'd never hurt her. He had broken that promise. She'd already been hurt by so many people, it was killing him to be another one of them.

Deciding to play good, dependable boyfriend slash father to be, he ran up to Joey and put his arms around her waist. She let herself lean against him tiredly.

"Hey beautiful," he said, ignoring the shocked expressions and knowing glances surrounding the two of them.

"Hey," she said. He kissed her neck, but she shrugged him off. "Don't."

He spun her around to look at him. "What?" He asked.

"Nothing. Just don't." Joey turned around and grabbed her bag. Dawson decided to forget her brush off and grabbed the bag from her.

"Let's go," he said. "You look tired." He smiled down at her. She put her hand to her head.

"Dawson," she snapped. "Stop hovering." He looked at her surprised at the outburst. She stalked out the front door, him following behind, still holding her bag.

* * * * *

Anne looked around at the group. "Alright," she said. "Whose next?" The counselor stared at Joey, who looked snappish, and Dawson, who looked worn down. "Dawson? Do you have anything to say?" Dawson looked over at Joey, almost as though he were asking her permission to speak. Joey crossed her arms, tapped her foot, and looked away at the ground.

"No," he said quietly. "I'm fine."

"Dawson, I'm sure there's something you want to talk about. Isn't there anything that's bothering you?" Dawson shrugged non commitedly.

"Sure," He said. "But Joey doesn't want me to say it." Anne looked at Joey. Her body language portrayed that she was angry at her boyfriend.

"Is that true Joey?"

"I could care less what he says."

"See!" Dawson exploded. "That's exactly what's bothering me! All I try to do is be a good boyfriend! If I'm supportive, then I'm hovering! If I don't ask her how she is, then obviously I don't love her anymore and I want to bail! I can't win! She's so grumpy ALL the time!"

"Excuse ME!" Joey jumped up. "Who get's whispered about all the time? HuH? And whose hormones have gone completely haywire lately?!"

Anne opened her mouth. "That is--"

"Does that give you the right to treat me like dirt every time I try to do something nice for you? This, this, this is hormonal, that's what it is!" Dawson was now standing up as well.

"Well-" Anne tried to break in, but JOey broke her off.

"Ooh ..You want hormonal! I'll show you hormonal, Dawson Leery! You have no idea how it feels to have the entire school looking at you!"

"Maybe--"Anne tried to say. The entire support group was now looking back and forth at Dawson and JOey, as if they were playing ping pong. They had never seen anything quite like this before.

"Oh, really, Josephine Potter? Let's review here, okay? I am the father of this baby, and people look at me wierd to! My english teacher can't even look me in the face, my father is barely speaking to me--"

"Which is basically your fault for telling him off like you did!"

Dawson continued, like he hadn't heard Joey. "Pacey keeps making jokes, Andie makes pity faces at me, Jack looks like he wants to lynch me, and my girlfriend won't even touch me, or let me kiss her! But my life is a piece of cake, isn't it, Joey?"

"Now, let's just--" Anne once again tried to regulate the fight. The rest of the teenagers in the room looked awed.

"Oh, yeah. Complain about how our friends look at YOU! Okay, I get twice as many pity faces as you, Andie gets hyper whenever she's around me like she has to keep my mind off the baby or something, and Jen, well, Jen's just eating this all up with a spoon! And excuuuse me for not wanting to have a make out session every night when I feel like I'm going to barf!"

"Oh, don't start with the Jen stuff again JO! She WANTS to be friends with you!" Joey shook her head.

"Oh, yeah? Then how come she won't directly talk to me anymore? It's because she's still in love with you and now that your going to be a dad, she knows that your too good of a guy to walk away from me and back into her arms!"

"Where the hell do you get this crap? Maybe she just doesn't know what to say around you anymore! I certanily don't! Your snappish with ALL of us, ALL the time! What will it take for you to just let the Jen stuff go? God, I wish.." He broke off. "Forget it."

"No, Dawson!" Joey looked at him, angrily. "You wish what? You wish you were with Jen?" Dawson shook his head and just blurted out what he was thinking.

"No. I wish I had never kissed you that night." Joey looked at him in shock. "I wish you had gone to France." Joey looked as though she were going to cry. She shakily sat down on the couch. Her face was a ghostly pale, and her entire body shook. Tears began too well up in her eyes as she searched Dawson's face. Dawson looked at her his mouth open. He seemed astonished at what he had just said.

"I-uh-I" He stuttered, and then simply turned and walked out of the room. Joey stared after him. She put her head down in her hands, as began to convulse with sobs.

"Dawson-" she said. The girls in the group suddenly sprung to life, grouping around Joey, hugging her.

One of the guys, Carl, who was sitting next to Anne looked at her, raising his eyebrows. "Well. There's something you don't see every day." Anne just sighed.

"It's okay," said one girl named Maria to Joey. "It's alright Joey."

Joey just shook her head and managed to choke Out, "No it won't. You don't understand, I can't do this without him!" before she dissolved into one giant tear. (That's a metaphor people! :) )

'After hours of deep thoughts
I came to the conclusion your just not
Meant to be with me
Every time there's a mistake
You leave.
Suffering under my smile
I'd be better off alone for a while
To Myself.
Cause I don't belong here
Youre so different from me
I want to be with you
But you make it so hard
Don't try to hold my hand
And don't try to understand
Don't tell your lies
I know them all
By now...'

* * * * *

Dawson wandered around the streets of Capeside, running his hands through his hair in exasperation and thinking. He hadn't really meant what he had said to Joey. Well, he had, but not the way she had taken it. He just wanted to protect her, that was all. That was all he had ever wanted to do. Love her and protect her. Suddenly Dawson spotted a familiar figure swinging her legs on the dock. He ambled over to her.

Jen Lindley sat sipping a Coke in deep thought. She was startled when she heard a familiar sigh, and a male figure plunked himself down next to her.

"Hey, Dawson." She turned to smile at him, but the facial expression faded as she saw the look on his face as he stared out at the waves in the creek.

"Jen," he said. "You and I are two of a kind." She shook her head.


"Nothing," he said. There were a few minutes of silence, before Jen again spoke.

"Dawson, I'm sure there's a reason your acting so strangly, even for you, but first..can I ask you something?" Dawson nodded, still staring out at the churning water.

"Does Joey still hate me?" Dawson now turned to look at her.

"What?" He asked, surprised.

Jen shrugged. "I know I'm not Joey's favorite person, but does she still despise me? Because I want to be supportive of Joey, but I'm confused if she wants me to be supportive and friendly or just stay away." Dawson snorted.

"Who isn't?" He looked at Jen, who was speaking in earnest and looked somewhat hurt by his short answer. "I'm sorry, Jen. She just, she won't let me help. But I know she needs it, even if she doesn't want to need it. I want to be there for her. I just don't know how anymore. I've--I've been trying so hard, and she just keeps building up that brick wall inside of her that she's been constructing since her mother died.." Dawson began to cry. Jen took in a deep breath. She knew now that they needed her help, whether they wanted it or not. The same way Joey needed Dawson, whether she wanted to or not. Jen reached for Dawson's hand, and gripped it tightly. He looked up at her questioningly.

"I want to be there for you too, Dawson." She smiled a little. Dawson hesitated only for a moment, before putting his head on her shoulder and crying onto it.

* * * * *

Maria's boyfriend, Eric, opened the car door for Joey. They had driven her home. Joey had thought she'd be fine walking, however, Eric had insisted, saying some men knew how to treat a lady. Joey had to laugh a bit at being called a lady.

"Thanks," she said. "I really appreciate it." She smiled through the window at Maria, sitting in the front passengers seat.

"No problem," Maria said. "I'd get out and hug you, but it's getting really hard to manuever myself around these days." Joey laughed at that. Maria was in her eight month. Just before they drove off, Maria squeezed Joey's hand.

"Don't worry. He'll come back." Joey sniffed, willing herself not to start crying again.

"Yeah, well..we'll see." Maria waved.

Joey turned to unlock the front door of her house, after climbing tiredly up the stairs. It was only eight, so Bessie would still be at the Ice House, and Alex was still at Lauren's, the babysitter. The porch light cast a faint glow in front of the door, but not on the rest of the porch. Joey started at the sound of a voice from the porch furniture.

"The reason I wish I never kissed you was that you wouldn't be hurting like this if I hadn't. I wouldn't have hurt you like this." Joey didn't turn around.

"That is the single stupidest thing I have ever heard, Dawson."

"Yeah, well, you know me and saying dumb things." He stood up. "I'm sorry Joey. I love you, and I was trying to protect you, but in doing so, I hurt you even more. "Joey sniffed and turned around, tears running down her face.

"I know," she said. "I'm sorry too. For being so moody, and for demanding one thing, and when you gave it for yelling at you for it. I don't know what's wrong with me." Dawson put his arms around her waist loosly, and whispered into her ear.

"I know whats wrong...Don't tell anyone, but your pregnant." Joey laughed and swatted him.

"You think your pretty funny, don't you Leery?" He nodded.

"I know I am."

"Oh, really?"

"Uh, huh." And the couple kissed for the first time in what seemed like forever.

* * * * *

Three weeks later Dawson and Joey were lying on his bed watching IF LUCY FELL. Joey was crying hysterically.

"God," she said. "This is horrible. The first time I saw this movie I laughed my ass off at how hokey it is, and now it's making me cry." Dawson grinned.

"I like this new sensitive Joey."

"Yeah, well, don't get used to it, buddy. In twenty five weeks, when this pain we affectionatly call our child leaves her-"

"His," Dawson said firmly.

"Yeah, right whatever you say. When she leaves HER residence in my body I'm going back to being my own cynical self."

"You still seem pretty cynical to me," Dawson laughed, stroking her hand.

"Ha ha."

"Oh yeah," Dawson remembered something. "I was supposed to give you a message from Jen. She said that shopping this weekend is still on? What's that all about?"

"Oh, we're just going to look at baby clothes with Maria and Andie. I introduced the three of them, and now we've all kind of bonded. Andie seems a bit awed at actually knowing TWO pregnant teenagers. Jen however, well, I'm glad I have her now. She's been a big help." Joey wasn't supposed to tell Dawson, but last week Jen had confessed to Joey that she had once been pregnant before, but she had miscarried. Joey shook her head. It was good that Jen wanted to be friends with her. She needed someone who could understand. "Anyway, Jen thought it would be good for me to get out. I swear, that girl in the past three weeks has become my own personal nursemaid. I don't know what's gotten into her. "Dawson coughed. He hadn't told Joey about his and Jen's talk. He still didn't know what would and wouldn't upset her these days.

"Joey?"He asked ten minutes later.

"What?" she said through her tears.

"Why are you crying at a Folger's commercial?" His arm was still throbbing the next day.


Zee song iz by zee zinger called Shelby Starner and I'm going to let ya'll take a WILD guess what the song is called, based upon what I have named the previous parts in this series. Until zee next one, I remain...well, me! :) Stay tuned for the next part..The shopping trip!



"Everything Changes eventually. That's the way life is and you have no control over it. Like suddenly people who you think are always going to be there disappear. People die and they move away..and they grow up...Everything changes eventually, Dawson." (This pretty much sums up my life! :) )

"Well, hurry up and find yourself, okay? Cause God I love you."

"I love you too, Dawson." And as the first snow falls Joey makes a wish... "My name is Andie, my brother is the one whose gay, my other brother died, and my father went away..But I'm still Andie, my boyfriend makes me randy, his name is Pacey, and mother's going crazy!"

"And then there's Jack McPhee. He likes guys, but he's not afraid to steal my girlfriend. Our own personal version of In and Out. First he's in, then he's out, in, out, in, out.."

"HE's not so gay anymore.." "I'm more gay than ever.." You tell em Jack! HEE HEE! :)

Previous | Next

Email Holly

Back to Holly's Stories | Back to Fan Fiction | Back to the Main Page

This page has been visited times.