I'll Cry Instead By Holly and Jenny

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"Shit!" said Pacey. "Oh, god damn!" Pacey paced (oh, that's cute!) the room.

"Oh Pacey. I m SO sorry! Is your girlfriend going to be ok?" Tamara had that maternal look in her eyes.

"Look, I m sorry, I can t talk, I have to go after her. You understand... you gonna be ok?" Pacey showed urgency and concern inhis voice.

"Yes, I ll be fine. Go ahead, you need to find her. I ll talk to you later." Pacey grabbed his jacket, and ran outside. "Andie! . . . ANDIE!" Pacey knew the first place she d run would be home. He grabbed the squad car, and headed down the roads he knew so well.

* * * *

Andie couldn t believe that she had ever put faith into this guy that supposedly was 100% loyal. Yet only 15 minutes earlier, she caught him red handed into the arms of a thirty-something woman. She was a mess. She flicked on the radio to keep her company, while she telepathically shot evil thoughts at her ex- boyfriend.An appropriate song came on her favorite oldieschannel.

I got every reason on earth to be mad,
Cause I just lost the only guy I had.
If I could get my way,
I'd get myself right up today,
But I can't So I'll Cry Instead

Boy, The Beatles sure knew what the hell they were talking about. She sunk into the overstuffed chair, and wallowed in self pity, hate, and disgust.

Suddenly, an urgent knock came on the door. It sounded like a policeraid.

"ANDIE! Andie, are you in there?" Pacey's voice was a decibel higher than usual; and he sounded extremely upset. Hah, HE was upset,she thought, narrowing her eyes.

"Go away Pacey! I never want to see you again!"

"PLEASE, I can explain! PLEASE!" Pacey's voice sounded more upset than it ever had before.

Andie, being the kind soul she was, opened the door "OK, you have exactly five minutes to explain yourself, Pacey Witter! "

"Umm, you might want to sit down." Andie's eyes flickered sadness,anger, concern, and hate. Reluctantly, she sat.

"Ok, here goes. You know that woman, Tamara Jacobs, was my English teacher. Umm, well, she USED to be more than that." He emphasized the word used, as Andie shot him this, 'NO shit, I kinda could have figured out she's more than that' look.

Hey, hear me out. You see, I met her in the summer, and she flirted with me, and then when I started school, she turned out to be my English teacher...

* * * *

"Bill, I can't tell you how much fun I've had with you." Jen looked at him, her hazel eyes filled with emotion. "I can't believe I'm living 50 feet away from you for the next 2 weeks!... So, do you want to go see that new Spielberg movie?" she said with a twinkle in her eye. A look of mock horror swept across Bill s face.

"AAAAHHHHH!" They both giggled, and kissed goodnight.

"Call me." She said.

Bill turned to walk back to Dawson's , as he thought how lucky he was.

* * * *

"Dawson, your poor mom tonight!" Joey said to Dawson as they walked up to his room.

"I know," Dawson's eyes filled with disgust. "Whoever knew my dad, or Ms. Jacobs could be so horrid!... Did you see Pacey? You could tell he DID NOT like what was going on."

"Well, duh," Jo replied. He doesn't want anyone else to sleep with his former lover." She grinned.

"JO!" Dawson scolded. They both looked at each other, and then Joey took his hand. Dawson leaned in to kiss her and they started to make out. They slid onto the bed, Joey on top of Dawson, kissing ferociously. Suddenly, Joey broke away.

"Dawson, I want to tell you something..."

* * * *

"... so that's the whole story." Pacey looked hopefully at his beautiful girlfriend, for any sign of forgiveness.

"SO, let me get this straight. You sleep with Tamara, then she almost gets put in jail, so she goes away, but now she comes back,Mitch has found out about you two, and blackmail's her to quote 'Be his girlfriend'"

"Right," said Pacey. "She told me about Mitch, and I was ONLY consoling her. I promise."

"Ok, I guess I believe you, so that part is forgiven, but there's still the issue that you slept with her, and... do you still love her?"

"God, no, Andie, I never LOVED her - I love you! And, I can't take back what happened between us, but it's all the past; and if you can find it in your heart to forgive me, I promise to never see her again."

Andie looked at Pacey, her eyes watered over as she realized that Pacey had just said that he loved her!! "Well, this is totally new for me, but I think I can forgive you, if, like you said, you never see her again."

"I promise, sweetheart." Pacey walked over to her, and embraced her, stroked her hair, and they both cried together.

* * * *

"Ok, what is it, Jo? Are you ok?" Dawson jumped up in concern.

"Dawson, I m fine, it s just that...ok, here's the thing. I really love you and I trust you completely. I ve been thinking and overanalyzing and well... I m...I mean... I think I m ready to sleep with you... Dawson? "

Dawson stared at her incredulously. "Are you serious? I mean, are you sure? "

"Yes, I m serious. And yes, I m ready. Are you ready? "

There was a long paused, and then he grinned, "Ready when you are.

I think we need a trip to the drug store for some supplies ! I ll get the keys to the Mitch mobile."

Joey grinned and shook her head. "I love you, Dawson."

* * * *

"So, have you ever done this before?" Joey picked up another box, and looked at the back. What are you supposed to base this on anyhow?

Dawson laughed gently. "Jo, why don't you go get some chow. I ll take care of this, k?"

Joey raised one eyebrow. "Can I TRUST you to do this?"

Dawson just gave her a look. "I think I can handle it." Joey turned to the other aisle; as Dawson looked back at the rack. "Now how the hell am I supposed to choose one of these?"

Joey paced back and forth in the chip aisle. "Oh my god. Oh my god.I can t believe that I am actually going to do this." She stopped for a sec, and smiled to herself; "We re actually going to do this!"

* * * *

"Mmmhmm...uh, Dawson," Joey pulled away a little. He put his mouth down on hers again. Oww! Dawson! Joey s head banged against the front door. Dawson had swung her up into his arms as they got out of the car. He thought it would be very sexy and great foreplay to carry her over the threshold.

"Uh Dawson, banging my head against your front door is NOT the best way to get me in the mood." Dawson grinned and then laughed. He set Joey down and unlocked the door.

"Sorry bout that," He couldn t stop laughing.

"If you want to laugh all night, then I could just go..." She swung the drugstore bag teasingly in front of Dawson. Joey sauntered up the stairs toward his room. Dawson stared at her longingly and then galloped after her.

Joey stood, leaning against the door frame, her sweater lying on the floor. Dawson s jaw dropped. So, ya comin in?

Dawson took off his shirt and slung it over the desk chair. Dawson looked at her intently and kissed her soft lips. She kissed him back passionately and the couple stumbled over to the bed. As their kisses became more intense Dawson felt around for the clasp of her bra. She ran her hands through his hair, and rested them around his neck.

Dawson unclasped her bra ans slid the straps down her shoulders. They continued to kiss passionately groping each other and feeling all the love between them flow into each other. All of a sudden, Dawson broke away.

"D-Dawson, what s wrong?" Joey looked up at him, her bra half off, looking very confused. He stared into her eyes. "Are you sure about this?"

"Oh, is that all? You had me worried for a minute there. I m sure. Stop being analytical Dawson." She reached up to kiss him again.

"Well, it s just that you got mad at me for the very same thing a couple weeks ago."

"Dawson." That one word convinced him it was okay to go on. He could tell just from her tone.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Joey placed her hands on Dawson s jeans, and started to unzip them as they slid into his bed. * * * * 2 Days later

"So, Pacey, do you see the problem? Mitch wants me to make out with him in front of Gail! Oh, I can't do this anymore!" Tamara cried in Pacey's arms. She had arrived 15 minutes earlier at his house. Pacey was so torn. He knew that this was against Andie s wishes, and she was due here in 15 minutes, but he felt so bad for Tammy. "Shh, it'll be alright." He stroked her hair, and placed an ever so light kiss on her forehead. He heard a clunk, and looked up into the fiery eyes of his girlfriend.

"Oh, Pacey. Am I interrupting? I'm sorry, TAMARA, but do you think I could talk to your ex-lover in private?" Tamara backed away. "Oh,my god, my god, I m so sorry; Andie, this is all my fault. It has nothing to do with Pacey ..." She trailed off as Andie s daggers shot into her eyes. She turned and ran out the door.

Andie turned to Pacey, who was hovering in a corner. "Andie...listen..."

"I know... I can explain . Get a new alibi! How could you?"END FLASHBACK

Andie looked in the mirror at her puffy eyes, as the song played through her head

I got every reason on earth to be mad,
cause I just lost the only guy I had,
If I could get my way, I d get myself right up today,
But I can t So I ll Cry Instead

You know , she thought to herself, I don t think my life is worth it anymore. I mean, I have no real friends, and no hope of doing anything better than this. I m all alone, and I don t have anybody. I can t take this anymore. She sighed, and took out a bottle of 400 mg aspirin. "I love you, Pacey Witter- you RAT!" She took down the mug from the sink, filled it with water, and took a deep breath.

* * * *

"ANDIE?" Pacey knocked on the front door. No answer. He tried the doorknob. It opened easily. "Andie? Where are you?" He looked in the parlor, kitchen, dining room, and then ran up the stairs. "Andie? Come on, talk to me!" He ran into her room, and covered his eyes. "Andie? Are you decent?" No response. Where WAS that girl? He walked to the adjoining bathroom, and knocked on the door. "Andie?" he opened the door, to see a small crumpled figure lying on the floor. "Holy... ANDIE!!!!!!!!!!" Pacey ran to her side to look for her pulse. He felt for a moment, and then burst into tears. "Oh my god. I m SO sorry. I love you. He ran to the phone."

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